There Once was a Man From Nantucket*

Who likes dirty jokes?

Everyone, that's who. Even the Pope is down for a raunchy limerick now and again.**

Here he is making a "Something About Mary" reference.

Knowing that, my original idea was to go online and just copy and paste a bunch of dirty jokes here and call it a day. To my surprise I was unable to find a single dirty joke on the internet.

Surprisingly when I did a GIS for "XXX" this is all that came up.
Seriously. Try it yourself. At work. With SafeSearch off.

My next thought was to come up with some dirty jokes of my own. Since no one had ever posted any on the internet before, it was bound to be a huge hit. But then I realized I'm lazier than most Danish people, and that would be a lot of work.

So finally I stumbled on the perfect solution. I'll provide the punch lines, and you guys can come up with the jokes yourselves! I'm a genius! No, really. Someone from the Genius Institute of Smart People and Air-Conditioning Repair (GISPACR) called me as soon as they heard this idea and told me I'm a genius. My ribbon is in the mail.

Anyway, below are 5 of the funniest, filthiest, bestest punch lines ever designed by man. See if you can come up with jokes worthy of them. My guess is no, you can't.

1. Bangkok isn't just a city in China.

2. Wheelchair? I hardly know her!

3. That's clearly not my penis.

4. ... and that's why they call me "Puzzle Humper."

5. I said "Sunday Brunch" not "Donkey Punch!"

* I have no idea what the rest of this limerick is, despite hearing this first line a million times. I think it has something to do with Kirby Puckett.

** This might not be true. I'm looking into it.